Bad Advice

A friend of mine is doing this 31 questions in March blogging writing challenge (https://marquessamatthews.com/2021/02/10/want-to-join-me-for-a-writing-challenge-alexandrafranzen/). I don't know if I'll manage to do the whole month. 

March 5 – What’s the worst piece of advice you’ve ever been given?

I have a respiratory condition. It started the morning of July 5, 2001. 

Not long after, I was still trying to live my life as normal, and FAILING with flying colors. 😬

I was with a doctor in 2002 and asking what to do when this and this and this and that caused respiratory attacks. (They didn't call them asthma attacks. And, given how incredibly bad they get, I don't either. It's not wheezing. I violently cough. My legs go out from under me. I lose the use of my arms. My senses fail one by one- vision, smell, taste, hearing, then touch. I'm told that, somewhere in there, I turn blue.) 

👨‍⚕️ The doctor said, "Don't do any of that until we figure this out." Meaning the respiratory problem. 

🤨 "Well what am I supposed to do?"

👨‍⚕️ "Just sit as still as possible as long as possible. Here's a note. You're not cleared to return to work until we have this under control."

That's the day I was put on short-term disability. But, because I never got a diagnosis (and "yeah, it's DEFINITELY something" didn't count), I couldn't go on long-term disability. But also couldn't get cleared to return to work. And my job told me that if I went to work elsewhere, I would be sued for the money I was given during my short-term disability leave. And then I lost my insurance because that job no longer covered it and I had no income for COBRA. Then I went bankrupt. 

I later got married and was put on my husband's plan. In July 2017, I saw 👩‍⚕️ Dr. Ribaudo-Kaufman (doctor 16 that is aware of my condition). I gave her my medical history.

"Who is 'we'?"

😶😳😶😮

There is no 'we.' There is no magical group of doctors sitting around figuring out my problem. This isn't House or Grey's Anatomy. No cure or treatment was coming. What's more, doctor 16 said that staying still had been the WORST thing I could have done. That it contributed to my rapid decline. But, then again, there weren't any meds that could have helped, but still, she felt that if more had been done, I wouldn't be as bad off as I am now.