Interview with ... the Final WEP Flash Fiction

https://writeeditpublishnow.blogspot.com/2023/11/wep-december-challenge-over-to-you.html

Interview with the 🧛‍♂️

Jamie Dorner

The stench of bleach and ointment hits me first. Blinds blot out the light of the northwest facing room with flowers wilting on the windowsill. A steady beep comes from one of the many machines connected to the man. His fingers curl, beckoning me near. I hit record on my phone as I set it in the holder, placing it on the table as I sit. 

He watches me as I get settled. "I never found jeans to be comfortable. Any metal zipper, those jagged teeth, over my sensitive organ feels unnatural," he says with a wheezing cough. 

I motion to his body. "Cotton hospital gowns worn by hundreds of others suit you better?"

"Sassing me is not in your interest. These coverings help the caretakers. Another cruelty of my existence is no longer being permitted to select my own clothes." 

I nod. "You're the longest living patient in this hospice facility. Possibly the longest under this type of care in the country or world. I'm still researching. Does that sound right?"

"Records I'm sure to break. You want the story of my life?"

"The medical journal I write and podcast for is interested in you, yes. I also have a story going about a transplant patient. First one ever to get— "

An alarm sounds as his machine flatlines. In a blink, the machine goes silent. "There. So much better with these infernal gizmos shut off. Shall we begin?"

"How did you do that?" I ask as a nurse runs in. 

He hands her a paper. "Signed and notarized. Off with you."

I'm dumbstruck. "What just happened?"

"A bit of business. A signed DNR allows me freedom from the machines."

"But you'll die!" Possibly before my interview is done. I can't stream this if he dies.

"That truly would be something to behold. Imagine if you caught the first death of a vampire on your recording device."

I glance at my phone to verify it is recording. "Vampire?"

"Indeed."

"Literally?" I ask. 

"I would very much enjoy telling you my whole story."

"Are you planning to drink my blood? To kill me? To turn me?" 

He points to an empty IV blood bag. "I've already fed. Killing you would only complicate my situation. As for turning you, well, I haven't done that sort of thing in ages."

I take a deep breath. "There's a window in the room. Does that worry you? Or my crucifix necklace?"

"The sun is annoying because my eyesight is enhanced, so it's much brighter to me than you. That's why I requested a northwest facing room. Religious symbols don't bother me, which is more than I can say for much of humanity. And no, the garlic you ate with your lunch doesn't make a difference, if you were about to ask. Silver is just a metal, but mirrors from centuries ago were not as good. I'm not a bat and, most disappointing, I cannot fly. There was a time when I was the greatest jumper in the world, but my knees aren't what they once were."

"Your knees?" I cross my legs, feeling my own knees move in the process, something I normally don't notice. "But you're a vampire."

"Yes. I'm immortal. I don't die. Who started the rumor that not dying equates to healing? The parts may last longer but they still wear out. Shall we begin with my human life? It wasn't interesting. Or my vampire one? Or are you still only interested in my years in hospice after the doctors have given up, believing they can do nothing more?"

"So you will die?" I rub my head. I didn't expect this interview to go this way. 

"No. I'll leave here. Get a caretaker for my basic needs. And wait another decade or two for science to come up with something." 

"Are you lying? Did you shut off the machine so I wouldn't notice tiny fluctuations in your heartbeat?"

The question is barely asked before he has me against the wall, pinned by my neck with my feet dangling. I see darkness in his eyes as sharp fangs extend from his mouth. 

    

    

Word count = 685

Tagline= Interview With The Vampire 🧛‍♂️  opening scene with some twists

(Movie version. Though Anne Rice is listed as the main script writer.)

#WEPFF DECEMBER ’23 #OVER TO YOU

I'm very sad that this is the last flash fiction prompt from WEP. Since I joined my cousin in law in doing these, I've finally had something to blog which is comment worthy. Other than April A to Z and my political thoughts, I'm not sure this blog will see much of my time. I love that WEP gave me a reason to write a little every other month. I focus so much on others I forget to do what I love. Especially with the horrible NaNoWriMo controversy this year that resulted in a forum shutdown and many asking if they want to be affiliated.

I hope some of you will still drop by from time to time. And I really hope the book comes out!

The Phantom of the Opera #WEP #WEPFF Flash Fiction and life

https://writeeditpublishnow.blogspot.com/2023/10/wep-october-flashfiction-challenge.html

#WEP - October #FlashFiction Challenge - The Phantom of the Opera - Post October 18 - 20
"What did you find the most inspiring? Rich pickings here for interpretations - obsessive love, abduction, child abuse, period romance, horror, disfigurement and disability and their acceptance, body image and confidence, music and musical careers..."

This is what's going on in my life. My husband might have PHANTOM pains for his toes soon, because his right big toe got infected and they have cut off all the toes on his right foot (and one on the left). Diabetes is horrible. The surgeon says he'll be able to walk again, wear shoes, go back to work, etc. They say that, but they don't say when. They say he will need physical therapy, but they don't say for how long. No one mentions costs or what our insurance will cover. In fact, my husband has some kind of "hospital indemnity" (security or protection against a loss or other financial burden) that I'm trying to get activated because he pays for it every week... This is exhausting. The website is CRAP. I got 404 errors until it said to email someone. Seriously? They make getting help as difficult as humanly possible. Oh, and I thought they screwed up my husband's check this last week, shorting him by a HUGE amount. But no, it's that the first 8 hours he works (roughly) go to pay for insurance and benefits. 🇺🇲 Like the hospital indemnity one I can't get anyone to activate. 😡



By the way, if you follow me on Instagram, I was hacked. I've tried to contact them every possible way, including 📫✉📬 sending an actual postal letter.
ACCOUNT HACKED! DO NOT USE!

instagram.com/jamie.writer
ACCOUNT HACKED! DO NOT USE! Unfollow me! Ignore any messages. I am not "starting a clothing company" or any other scam the hacker says.

I'm going to try to squeeze NaNoWriMo in this year, but EVERYTHING depends on my husband's healing process. https://nanowrimo.org/participants/jamiewriter Open to Buddy requests.

Onto the story, which I wrote mostly on the Google Docs app on my phone because I've been away.

Phantom of the Boarded-Up House

By Jamie Dorner of Uniquely Maladjusted but Fun

"We dare you to follow Phantom tonight." PollyAnne rubs her chin as her lips curl into a mischievous grin. She's so beautiful. 

"You need to take a video to prove you were in the lair." Lilah wiggles her fingers and makes a ghostly woo sound. She's the youngest teen volunteer here.

"In or out?" Clint extends his muscular hand. His frayed letterman jacket cuff has a lipstick stain. It might be Lilah's. PollyAnne doesn't wear lipstick. 

This is it. My one chance to be part of their group. A chance PollyAnne will see me, not look through or past me. I shake Clint's hand. "I'm definitely in."

Phantom leaves the nursing home at eight, the same time as our teen volunteer group. The hood of a cloak is affixed around a face mask. Who wears a cloak? There's a rumor that the mask covers horrible burns. I follow Phantom onto the public bus. 

Stop after stop, the city lights brighten as the night darkens. Leaves fall as the bus pulls near the curb. I get off a moment after Phantom. Why travel all this way? 

I try to seem casual, scrolling on my phone as I follow without wanting to look like I'm stalking. Autumn leaves crunch under our feet. Phantom turns to a rusted gate. A squeaky protest rings out, sending a shiver down my spine. I duck behind a minivan. Phantom pulls out a hammer, uses the clawed end to free some nails, then pulls a boarded-up door open. 

I snap a picture for Clint as Phantom pockets the nails and slips inside.

A reply text comes. "That's the outside of a boarded-up house. You could be anywhere in the old former-rich part of town. Not good enough." 

I look around. Houses three times the size of mine crumble and rot all around me. Sale signs with years of grime flap in the autumn breeze. A rat climbs out of a decayed jack-o-lantern. Waste of food.

"Get away from my house!" 

I jump back. An old man in the minivan waves a shotgun at my face.

"This is my spot. Get your own!"

I put up my hands as I step back, sprinting once I'm far enough away. I go around the corner, locating the back of Phantom's place. Creepy music comes from within. Is that a piano? No, it's deeper, darker, a sound I've never heard. The windows are all boarded up. A tree rests against the back of the house, as if too old and exhausted to stand on its own. There are no leaves left on the branches. I jump the rusty fence. A loose board on the second floor has light flickering behind it.

PollyAnne, this is for her, this is my chance. I take off my belt and use it to help me climb the tree. I wish I were more prepared. Tools, knowledge on breaking into a house, a better flashlight than my phone can offer, anything. It's a struggle, and I nearly fall twice. Finally, I'm inside.

Cobwebs linger among moldy boxes. A small, lit lamp with horse cutouts on the shade spins on a dirty nightstand. I sneak through a path on the worn-down rug. The music pauses.

"Careful of the broken stair if you're coming down. There's nothing worthwhile to steal anymore, and you're not gonna want my body." The music restarts.

That is the weirdest response to breaking and entering I can imagine. I make my way down the creaking stairs. A centipede crawls up my leg. Phantom isn't joking about the broken one. I nearly fall through a hole as I brush off the myriapod. At the bottom, I turn on my phone's video recorder.

Phantom sits at the most peculiar-looking piano I've ever seen. Far too many keys in a strange tiered-arrangement. The wall is covered in vertical brass pipes.

"People can hear this for quite a distance. It's why they say the place is haunted. Guess I'm the ghost. Are you here to kill me?"

"No," I answer with a shaking voice. "I'm, uhh, well, it's kind of an initiation." I stop the video and press send. 

Phantom lights several candles on one holder. I've never seen something like that. 

"People once paid to learn from me. And paid more to hear me perform. Those days are long gone." Phantom pulls a thick leather book from a shelf. It opens to pictures printed out on paper. "What are you being initiated into?"

"It's this group of friends. See, there's this girl— "

"Ahh!" Phantom cuts me off. "Yes, I know something about that." Pages flip in the photo book. "That was mine. Christine. We didn't end up together, though." 

"Oh?" I choke on dust as I step nearer, the floor creaking under me.

Phantom taps the face mask. "When it's not true love, many obstacles can be too much for someone to overcome. She denied it with her dying breath. Still, I'm sure it wouldn't have worked out. I could never give her children. She should have become a mother. Terrible how it ended." 

I want to ask how she died. But what if the reason Phantom hides here is because there's an open murder investigation?

"Wow. Well, I'm gonna go." I cough as I get a whiff of a rotting stench. 

"Are you sure you wouldn't like to stay for a concert? I'm not tired yet." 

"No, no, I should go check on the initiation. See about the girl. You know?" A chill goes through me. The candle flames flicker and puff out. 

"Oh, I do know. I'm just not sure I want break-ins to become a regular habit. You leaving so easily might be a problem." Phantom pounds on the keys, filling the cold air with eerie music. 

963 words FCA

Tagline: Teen initiation includes B&E to Phantom's ghostly concert.

Recipe time

 

I love it as is, but you could 🌶 spice it up.

Pink Ribbon

 Out of respect for her, I won't mention who I left this comment for originally. 

But I am sharing it here because there are too many people (women, men, people) who get breast cancer. 

My friend was lucky that she happened on a mammogram appointment while getting other tests. Lucky because they think they may have caught it early enough to possibly do something. But the plan for that something is not yet in place. 🤞

I wanted to reply with hope and support, but also to make her smile. She has a great smile and made me laugh so many times at work. 

My comment:

Big huge hugs. I hope they are able to help you and take care of your mental and emotional needs while dealing with the cancer. I know they said not to google info, but what about looking for a support group? To have other people who have gone through this and are best equipped to help you deal? 

I'm sorry, but I don't believe anyone who (was a/ identified as a) teenage boy is capable of fully grasping what growing boobs was like, and therefore cannot fully understand what surgery on them means mentally and emotionally for most people who have boobs they like. That's just my opinion. The first time you were grateful for them. The first time you hated them and wished they go away. The first time some strange old sales lady felt you up at the store so you could get a bra. The many times after that some sales lady felt you up in a store while saying you probably don't know your own bra size.  Trying on bras and questioning what drunk crackhead designed this and how he (definitely he) got the designs messengered from his mom's basement to a fashion place where they made it. Like, you go through a lot. And I just don't think a "mister doctor" can really understand that. Sympathetic? Sure. But I've never seen a sales dude at a sports store whip out the tape measure and grab another guy's junk, "You're probably wearing the wrong size cup, most men don't correctly measure their balls before shopping. Lift your leg, dear, let me get in there." 

(Dude, if I didn't at least make you crack a tiny smile picturing sports dudes measuring balls in a store, seriously... come on... )

Holes

 There's this hole inside of me. Pain, grief, loss, darkness, ending. 

I don't remember the last time my mom and I hung out for fun. There are years where we hung out all the time. There are shows we watched together while sharing dinner many nights of the week. There were trips together, just us. We were best friends. We kept secrets for each other. We were sisters. We were so close.

But I got sick. I got chronically ill. I had problems beyond help. And it was too much. She had health problems too. Obviously. People don't just have heart attacks out of nowhere usually. 

But when was the last time we hung out, just the two of us? 

I don't know. But I feel like it was years. 

When my leg was all messed up, she took my husband to the store. For weeks. He knows the last time they hung out. 

I know we went to Shady Maple the Valentine's before she died. That's months before. Feb to Sept. That's months apart.

I know she took me to the hospital in May the year before that. That's not fun. That's not hanging out. 

The "new" 4 episodes of Gilmore Girls sat unwatched in my Netflix for a long time. I was waiting to watch it with her. We never did. She might have seen it on hers eventually. I don't know. She was busy.

So busy.

No one from her work came to her funeral. Once they had that tablet back, they never checked in again. 

She was strong for everyone. She did everything for everyone. She was the shoulder, the punching bag, the sounding board, the one who covered, the one who fixed. Sometimes the one who broke, and caught hell for it. The family keystone can't break, can't have a flaw. She inherited that role from my grandmother. I believe my grandmother got it when my great grandfather died, a few weeks before I was born. 

My dad almost died when my mom was pregnant with me. Fell asleep driving. How hard must that have been for her? 

I don't know if it ever got easier. 

The hole is so big. It's impossible to fill. It will never go away. It's never going to be okay. 

Just like the hole for my daughter.

Just sit here and watch as everyone dies. And eventually I'll be gone too. 

Who will take care of my husband? Who will be there for him when he says he doesn't need anyone? He's so good at pushing people away. I'm scared he won't let anyone help him, even if they try to help him for me, in my memory, to allow my soul to rest. But I'm also terrified that he'll go first. I don't want to be without him. I know I could, but I do not want to exist without him. There would be no point. 

The hole is very dark. And there is more than one hole. How many holes until there's nothing else? One minute it's lace, then threads, then nothing. 

Just words. I'm okay. 

Or as okay as I can be and there's really nothing to be done. 

The reason I know I'm okay? Because I can look at the pills controlling my menstrual cycle and know that the big emotions are out of balance because of where I am in my cycle. So I know all this will calm down. Without scientific evidence, I would NOT know I'll be okay. And then I would not be.  The darkness would win if I didn't have concrete evidence for my logical side to assure me that this is chemical and everything will be more manageable in a few days. I'm dependent on that evidence.

Bout of Books 38 Recap and Winning News

Bout of Books 38- August 2023 

boutofbooks.blogspot.com


https://twitter.com/PenMinion/status/1690055986310979594 My sign-up.
https://uniquelymaladjustedbutfun.blogspot.com/2023/08/bout-of-books-birthday.html Also on my blog.
As you can see, I'm doing this with a friend.

If you follow my blog, you also know my Instagram was hijacked during BoutOfBooks. Because I needed to take time from reading to deal with a hacker? 😡

A GOOD THING HAPPENED:

Chocolate and Death #WEPFF Flash Fiction won an award. Highly controversial flash fiction.


Back to my readathon wrap up with reviews:

---

This first book was J's pick.

Shattered: A Story of Betrayal and Courage by C. Lee McKenzie  ⭐⭐⭐


On the TV show Grey's Anatomy Season 9 Episode 13, there's a patient with a double hip replacement, a 13-year-old gymnast named Simmi Johnson. She does not want to do her physical therapy rehabilitation. Her dark negativity brings several of the doctors down. She was an Olympic hopeful and now she can barely walk. That patient from that episode reminded me of Libby in this book. Actually, the multitude of episodes where Arizona is obsessed with her left leg also reminded me of Libby. Except those were accidents, not sabotage. 

(I'm also reminded of the first Friday the 13th film. Even though this book isn't horror, there is a common bond.) 

There are things in the book that I do not understand. Overall, Libby seems to be very privileged. The family can afford a personal in-home therapist for rehab, a new car with handicapped driving controls, at least a three-bedroom house, a greenhouse, a remodeled handicapped-accessible bathroom, Olympic-level ski equipment and training, and regular trips to the lake. But Libby mentions how she once had to save money on haircuts? I don't understand that, especially considering the mom seems like a diva with serious beauty upkeep. 

I also could not work out the time toward the end of the book. Chapter 23 says there will be a race on Saturday and Sunday. No practice Friday before the race. Chapter 24, Libby goes to bed on Thursday night. She calls Harley in the morning, and they make plans for that day (Friday), leaving at 9am. They go to the village. Meet Dirk. Chapter 25, they go see Etta. Then they decide to stay in the area for the night at Parker's. They spend Chapter 26 going to sleep. Libby tells her dad they're staying another day. That's where I got confused because there's supposed to be a race on Saturday, so is she ditching her team? But hang on. Chapter 27, they wake up before dawn. It is, therefore, Saturday. At 4am, they get to their destination. Chapter 28, they go see Peter. Then Grady's Cafe. The sun is now topping the mountain. They drive for three hours. Shelby has ten others in line ahead of them. Libby and Harley have been awake for seven hours (so it's 11am?) They keep falling asleep. And then they get the Friday introductory rate, after a conversation verifying that it is Friday not Saturday. Except it has to be Saturday? Because they left Friday at 9am on this quest, went to sleep, and started again the next morning which has to be Saturday. Right? In the late afternoon of this magical day (Friurday), they stop for food and coffee. Then they are stuck because two smart girls did a dumb. Chapter 29, the sun dips low. There's a conversation with an elderly woman. The moon is out. It's now "nine." The race is at "six." By Chapter 30, it's after seven. They have to stop for vitals, then it's seven-thirty. Now Libby has to be there by "ten" instead of by "six." This is justified because she's missing warm-ups. At nine-thirty, they're forty-five minutes away. She's late but somehow makes it anyway. Then after the race (which is allegedly on Saturday), she makes plans with Ash for "tomorrow night at six." Chapter 32, she's getting ready to go see Ash. Okay, so the plan was for "tomorrow." The tomorrow that normally follows Saturday is called Sunday. But the tomorrow that follows "Friurday" is Saturday, apparently. I am so freaking confused! Libby tells her mom she's rowing the next day. Then there's a voicemail and Libby realizes something about the race taking place tomorrow. Meaning it's Saturday again, or Friurday. She goes to dinner at Ash's. He toasts to the win "yesterday." Meaning it's definitely Sunday. What happened to the race that was supposed to take place on Sunday? "It was such a close one today." Oh, so maybe that race took place? Okay. "Are you up for tomorrow's big race?" WHAT? So is there a third race on Monday that was never mentioned before? Friurday might be Friursunday. The chapter ends with him mentioning getting sleep before the next race. Chapter 33, she gets up and goes to the race. No other race is mentioned for the next day. So, logically, it was Sunday. But the dinner with Ash was Saturday, even though the plan was for the next night. As I said, it made no sense to me. I could not work out the timeline.

Marcus is seventeen when we first meet him. In Chapter 42, we learn that Marcus will be an adult "in a couple of years." What age is adulthood there? 

"The only way to dispel doubts is to investigate." I really loved it when Harely said that. 

I thought the character development was good. Libby definitely changes and evolves through the book, and the reader certainly gets to see it. Some of the other characters also improve. The mystery villain who orchestrated the accident made sense to me. Other than the inconsistencies in days and finances, I thought the book was okay. It was different from the usual books I enjoy. 

This is my honest review of a book I borrowed from a family member. 

---

This next book was my pick.

Christian Garcia Is Fu*king Obsessed (21 Boys Later Book 2) by Dori Aleman-Medina  ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

This book was so fun to read. It was a birthday gift sent to me by the author whom I've known online since MySpace, thanks to our shared love of books, games, and scrapbooking. This is my honest review. These characters are absolutely amazing and so very well developed. They have all kinds of problems and struggles to deal with, which keeps the plot moving quickly along. There were some really fun throwbacks to the first book. The heat is dialed up to eleven, making it romance nudging on the side of erotica. The setting came alive. There's a school for special needs children that sounds so well-funded and devoted to really helping children excel. I couldn't help but wonder how much a detective and a cake bakery owner earn a year because they seem to be doing really well. 

There are trigger warnings because things do get dark. Language, s3x, violence, adult subject matter, teens having consensual s3x in complicated relationships, and mental health issues all come up. I'd like to warn you about tacos. Because, listen, there's a gathering at the house, and there are tacos. "Leftover tacos," which I've never heard of leftover ones... but the point is that you might want to stock up on some tacos beforehand. And probably milkshakes as well. I could also mention chocolate cake, but if you've read the first book, you already know what that means. 

If you're looking for a steamy hot romance book with lots of drama and suspense, this is the book I'd recommend to you.

---

This final book was our quick pick.

Binti by Nnedi Okorafor   ⭐⭐⭐⭐

Phenomenal science fiction. I learned about real-world places and cultures while flying through space and discovering alien species that are dealing with problems that are very much like ones here on Earth. There's an episode of The West Wing (Season 2, Episode 10, Noël) that reminds me of the conflict because of what C.J. discovers about a woman in a tour group in that show. I enjoyed the resolution offered in the book. It ends with the main character evolving physically, mentally, and emotionally after having faced and succeeded against many serious challenges. There is a scene of violence in this book that may trigger some readers. This is my honest review.

#shelfie #boutofbooks 38
What I read during the readathon #books #BookTwitter #BookRecommendations #DiverseReads #DiverseBooks pic.twitter.com/VHSWqSSjb2

— JamieWriter (@PenMinion) August 28, 2023

What have you read and reviewed lately?

Instagram Down

 My precious Instagram account has been attacked. I got a message from a friend saying she was starting a fashion line.

Except it was actually a hacker.

By the time I was suspicious, my account was gone. I was logged out.

Maybe I'll get it back next week. Maybe not.

This SUCKS.

It happens that fast.

6:02 pm

7:11 pm

An hour to destroy years of memories and self expression. 

And for what? There was nothing valuable linked to my Instagram account.

Why I Write to Elected Officials

Yup. Every time I write my elected officials, someone points out that I've wasted my time because they're not interested in what anyone who isn't contributing thousands of dollars to campaigns has to say. 

And yeah, that's maybe true. 

But it isn't about them. It's about me. I've done something. I asked myself what I could do, what I am reasonably and honestly capable of doing. And then I did that. 

Maybe it won't make a difference. It probably won't. BUT I TRIED. 

I can live with myself knowing at least I tried. 

Just like voting. Maybe my one little vote is less than a 💧 drop of water in the ocean. But that's still better than not at least trying. 

No, I don't think I made a difference. I think I tried something. And if didnt work, at least I can say I tried. I made an attempt. 

Not everyone who sets out to climb Everest makes it successfully to the top and back. But everyone who ever has done this achievement TRIED.

Facebook.com

The Typo Debate

https://www.facebook.com/groups/girlfriendbookclub/permalink/1966150417103202/

Carolynn Clark:

"I am reading The Lincoln Highway by Amor Towles which is a great book BUT how annoying when I find errors that were missed in editing…… what do you all think of this sentence? I can’t believe the word PORPOISE was used instead of the word PURPOSE. Am I missing something? is this a legitimate word to use in the following sentence? “What Woolly did not tell Billy was that sometimes-like when he first arrived at St Paul’s-he would wind the watch sixteen times for six days in a row on porpoise so that he could be half an hour ahead of everybody else.”"

My reply:


Viking Publishing is owned by Penguin, a big 5 publisher.

So yeah, I am surprised there would be an error.

One of the "arguments" certain readers use for reading Big 5 publications instead of Indie books is that the Big 5 can afford editors to check everything with a fine tooth comb.

But really, Indie authors tend to be the ones checking and rechecking and using editors.

*Not all, in either case. Just more often than not.



It's funny how they'll tell authors that one typo can get you rejected. Then say that it's okay to have a typo because that's what an editor is for! And then books come out with a typo and the audience absolutely crucifies the author (not the publisher, not the editors) in reviews, memes, etc. Then a few people will debate, on behalf of the author, as to if spelling and grammar are tools of racism and if language exists to foster oppression. (Which is an intriguing debate, especially since outlawing literacy is and always has been specifically implemented to oppress and control people.) A debate possibly created by the PR firm for the Big 5 publishers, proving that no press is bad press.

🤔

And that right there is the real rub. Because then you have to ask yourself if the typo was put there on purpose to force a debate?

Because there's a comic from 20 some years ago that is still true today, that states if you want to get the attention of everyone on the Internet, misspell a word.

🤔🤷‍♀️🤔🤷‍♀️🤔🤷‍♀️🤔🤷‍♀️🤔🤷‍♀️🤔🤷‍♀️

That sounds nutty, right?

It couldn't be true.

There's no way such a ploy could ever work!

Readers cannot be manipulated that easily.

🤔😶

Oh.
Ummm...
Huh
😒
How many comments and reactions does this post have?

---

What are your thoughts?

Product Review - Rainbow Light Multivitamin for Women NEW AND IMPROVED

 I'm writing a product review today because I want to discuss what "New and Improved" means here.

First of all, you can't improve something that is new. And something that has already existed is not new. 

Has the value or quality of this multivitamin been enhanced or made better? 

Pro:

Vitamin C went from 60mg to 90mg.

Biotin went from 30mcg to 50mcg.

Con: 

Vitamin A cut in half from 1800mg to 900mg.

Thiamin from 20mg to 6mg.

B2 from 20mg to 5.6mg.

Magnesium from 100mg to 50mg.

Unsure:

Now includes Croscarmellose Sodium and Maltodextrin

The botanical blend now includes ashwagandha 

The new vitamin is a little smaller (perhaps because so much has been removed) and is less fragrant (the previous version had a slight vanilla scent, in my opinion). It seems like a cheaper version of the old product, and therefore to my mind, it is neither NEW nor IMPROVED. 

Chocolate and Death #WEPFF Flash Fiction

https://writeeditpublishnow.blogspot.com/2023/07/wep-august-challenge-chocolat-post.html

Flash Fiction

Chocolate and Death

By Jamie Dorner

*TRIGGER WARNINGS= Murder-suicide, alcohol, language, pedophilia, abortion laws, cancer, house fire.

Tagline: A tragic, controversial, trigger-heavy realistic fiction.
MPA 950 words

I start the fire on a pile of split wood dipped in kerosene outside. A slow burn will give me time. I march into the house. His bowling trophies adorn the mudroom. I knock each one over, watching the precious awards break, stomping on them to be sure none survive. I tip the vodka bottle over the shattered remains. 

"Cheers to your victories, asshole." 

I remember the first time he celebrated a win after I moved in. I was ten.

"Just like the number of pins and frames!" 

I cried harder that night than the months before, when I was mourning my parents. I tried to tell, tried to get help. Everyone cut me off, saying how grateful I must be that my Uncle Cyprus took me in. 

I pour more vodka around the kitchen as I search. There's always a box hidden somewhere. 

The den has a pile of unopened mail. Bills from the hospital. Bright red envelopes from collection agencies. Three stacks of envelopes from places that will never get paid. Cyprus has no life insurance. I take a swig of the vodka. No reason not to drink. I rub my abdomen. Nope, no reason at all. 

Once the desk drawers are flung about, and the vodka is poured out, I leave the room. I grab another bottle from the liquor cart in the living room. There must be a box somewhere, but I haven't found it yet. I knock all the pictures off the mantle. Cyprus with my dad. Cyprus with his bowling team. Cyprus with his car. No pictures of me. My parents' mantle had many pictures of me, of us together, and of their wedding. Love and hope, reasons to live. I soak his pictures with alcohol. I wish I could erase him from the world, to destroy all proof he existed. 

I yank his autographed baseball bat off the wall and head to the bathroom. I take a quick chug from the bottle before I start smashing. Seven years of bad luck for breaking a mirror? I've already had those! I glare at the motion-activated cameras he has hidden and flip them off. Let his perverted subscribers see. My final showing will be one of death and destruction. 

The smoke alarm blares as I head down the hall. My slow-burning fire has finally gotten inside. Good. But I still want to find a box.

I go into his room. This is where I made my choice. I kick his bloody body. "I know you've got a box of them somewhere. I'm going to find them. The very last box ever."

His corpse remains silent. I throw dresser drawers on him as I search. Finally, in his nightstand, I find the treasure. His Bible, as if he has any idea what that book is about, a clip of extra bullets, and the last box of chocolates. I take the box and kick the bullet hole I put in his head. 

"Told you I'd find them." I take another swig of vodka and then pour the remainder of the bottle on him and his drawers of clothing. 

I head to my room. On my desk are printouts from the doctors. Most are about my cancer and the treatment plan. Then there's one which states that I'm pregnant and thus ineligible for cancer treatment. Next is an official state document warning that I will face murder charges if the pregnancy isn't successful. Except, without the treatments, I won't survive into the second trimester. The paper on the top has a fuzzy ultrasound image attached. The fetus is deformed and underdeveloped because of my cancer. 

Humming to myself, I fill my stolen needle and then inject each chocolate. I look at the teddy bear with the webcam eye.

"I wanted to live. Just four more months and I would have been eighteen. I could have left legally. The cops brought me back three times before. But as an adult, I would have been free! Getting me knocked up might have held me back for a little longer. It's illegal to cross state lines without permission while pregnant. But my cancer-ridden body is murdering the fetus. It's illegal to grant needed medical care here in my condition. So, since I'd be dying while imprisoned for murder, I saw no reason not to kill Cyprus."

I pop a chocolate into my mouth. It oozes on my tongue. The poison stings, but the chocolate still tastes sweet. Puffs of smoke sneak under my bedroom door. 

"This is gonna be a snuff film. I hope you all get caught watching it. I hope the authorities find each and every one of you and lock you up on charges of child pornography." I eat another chocolate. "I sent copies of his computer stuff to the FBI and six news agencies. Hopefully, someone bothers to check."

It's harder to enjoy the next chocolate. The poison is fast-acting. My damaged bedroom door has tiny flames in the cracks. 

"Please know that I do not regret my choices. If I could have prevented him from molesting me, I would have. If I could have avoided him impregnating me, I would have. I'd gladly do any cancer treatment offered. I would have fought to live. And I'd have left without killing him. Yes, I thought about it. That murder was absolutely premeditated. I am grateful to be guilty of it. I might have left him alive. This is better." 

The last chocolate passes over my lips. It sticks to the roof of my mouth as my eyes close. The world fades away as the treat he always denied me mixes with my final breath. 

---

This story takes place in America. 

It may or may not be currently legal for a pregnant minor to cross state lines. There was some debate as to if human beings are the property of a state, or if that would be similar to the terms of slavery. Also, it's difficult to enforce as there's not much separating most states. 

Miscarriages may or may not be illegal, and may or may not come with a murder charge. The removal of a fetus which has a failure to thrive and has no signs of survival is also called abortion, but not removing it causes toxins that kill the host.

In some states, a pregnancy test must be done before anyone with a vagina can receive any healthcare treatment (like an Xray) that could risk a potential fetus, even when not getting that treatment immediately can mean the patient dies.

Many treatments can be denied in certain states even if there is absolutely no possible way the fetus can survive long enough in a dying host to be a viable birth -- which is the case in this story. She has been denied cancer treatment because of the pregnancy, but the fetus would never have been born anyway, it could never develop lungs or other needed organs, and the cancer will win. If she were permitted to have treatment, she might go on to have many children, maybe become the scientist who cures cancer, who knows. The fetus is no longer viable at the start of this story. The main character is dead at the end of this story. 

I'm sure there are people out there who believe cancer patients deserve to die if they're impregnated against their will. I don't. So I wrote this. 

Here are a few links, if this story doesn't seem like "realistic fiction" to you:

https://www.politico.com/news/2022/03/19/travel-abortion-law-missouri-00018539

https://www.pbs.org/newshour/show/idaho-criminalizes-helping-minors-travel-out-of-state-to-get-an-abortion

https://www.npr.org/sections/health-shots/2023/03/01/1158364163/3-abortion-bans-in-texas-leave-doctors-talking-in-code-to-pregnant-patients

https://www.bbc.com/news/world-us-canada-59214544

https://www.npr.org/2022/07/03/1109015302/abortion-prosecuting-pregnancy-loss
https://www.nytimes.com/2023/08/09/us/politics/ohio-abortion-issue-1-takeaways.html

I'll close with a comment I left on a NanoLand post on Facebook about a political fiction story idea that amuses me. Fiction, because there's no possible way a strong Latina and a Drag Queen will win a presidential election anytime soon. I mean, I'd vote for it, but the MAGA Reps would sooner start a war.

https://www.facebook.com/groups/NaNoWriMoparticipants/permalink/10167992311155637
https://www.ocasiocortez.com -- AOC website
https://maebeagirlforcongress.org

Bout of Books birthday 🎂

The Bout of Books readathon is organized by Amanda Shofner and Kelly Rubidoux Apple. It’s a weeklong readathon that begins 12:01am Monday, August 21st and runs through Sunday, August 27th in YOUR time zone. Bout of Books is low-pressure. There are reading sprints, daily Discord questions, and exclusive Instagram challenges, but they’re all completely optional. For all Bout of Books 38 information and updates, be sure to visit the Bout of Books blog. - From the Bout of Books team

Remember the bird! 🐦🐤

I'm participating in #BoutOfBooks 38 starting August 21. Join me! (You were going to read anyway, right?!?!) https://t.co/DJcVRSVB5R @jlennidorner 😜

— JamieWriter (@PenMinion) August 11, 2023

What's funny is that we rarely chat using FB messenger. But we had been doing something on there. Anyway, so this happened.

Ninety Six point Eight Fahrenheit

 96.8°F

The problem with having a lower than normal body temperature is that 👨‍⚕️👩‍⚕️ medical personnel don't recognize the seriousness of your fever until it's dangerously high. When I hit 102° it's like an average person hitting 105°.

With my respiratory condition, when I have an attack, my temperature shoots up. My brain is cooking. 

So my life depends on avoiding warm air. My temperature is good today, as I am inside with my air conditioners and fans, relaxing.

"normal body temperature can range between 97 F (36.1 C) and 99 F (37.2 C)" 🌡

WEP Kitchen Counters and the Refrigerated Kind #WEPFF

Hello reader! Today's post has three parts. First, a memory and why I'm so excited about this challenge. Second, the flash fiction, which is mostly meant to be funny, but is a slight commentary on how beliefs factor into arguments. And third is an info dump of knowledge related to the prompt.

💝🤵👰🔔 Wedding day memory:

Close Encounters was one of my mom's (RIP) favorite movies. Her mobile phone was an ancient slide-open, not smartphone. (Morpheus had one in The Matrix.) You couldn't add ringtones, you used one of the dozen offered in the menu. The tones from the Close Encounter movie, "🎵 do do do do do" was her ringtone (and notification sound, alarm sound, etc). By April 2007, when I got married, no one else I knew still had one of those phones. Everyone else had smartphones with specialized ringtones. So, when you heard the sound from the movie, you knew "the aliens are contacting mom!" 

Also, everyone else I knew hit "silent mode" for events like a wedding. 

There I am, up on the altar of the church, holding my groom's hands, the Pastor reciting from the Bible. 

"🎵 Do do do do do"

*Must not laugh*

"🎵 Do do do do do"

I hear my brother trying to stiffle his laugh. *Must not laugh. Must not look at Kevin. Will not be able to contain laugh if I look at brother.* 

"🎵 Do do do do do"

We can hear my mom reaching down her dress, because she always kept her phone in her bra. Apparently, my wedding day was no exception! (No, the phone didn't have a camera. No, it was not one of her bosses calling.) It was the alarm on her phone she had set to go pick my brother up for work. Mind you, he was now out of high school and had his own vehicle and she hadn't picked him up in years. But she kept the alarm because she liked the reminder that it was that time of day. (The way Church bells used to ring out at noon to mark the time. But this was more like 2:30.) 

She managed to shut it off. My brother and I managed (barely) to contain ourselves until after the ceremony. And then lost it in the receiving line as guests were exiting, and someone asked me what the "kinda familiar music" was during the ceremony. 🤣🤣😄😄😄😄😅

Wedding Day back in 2007. There's my mom beside me.

So, yeah, when I saw this prompt, that was the first thought to spring to mind. And I have been waiting for months to share that with you, dear reader. I hope you're giggling. I'm grateful for that memory. That's really who my mom was; she could make you laugh even at the most serious moment, sometimes without trying. 

The Flash Fiction:

Kitchen Counters and the Refrigerated Kind

By Jamie

687 words MPA

Tag: What if you're an alien to those in your refrigerator? 

🥔

"Russet, Russet, did you see that? In the light. There was a form." 

"My eyes are not what they once were, though I have more of them now. Listen, Spud, we're not meant to know what happens in the light." 

"What's all this commotion?" Water asked.

"Spud sprouted new eyes today, Water Sir, and thinks he saw something while the Great Light was on," Russet answered.

Gasps and murmurs came from the other occupants. 

Vanilla Yogurt rumbled, "We are not to observe the goings on when the Great Light is lit. That simply isn't done. If you had cultures, as I do, you would know this. Your kind does not belong here." 

"I'm in my proper drawer!" Spud cried. "I came to this place, same as you. And have been a resident longer."

"Butterworth. Butterworth! Ketchup, nudge her for me, will you?" Vanilla Yogurt waited while the door condiments woke the ancient syrup. 

"Yes, child?"

"You have survived here the longest. Does Spud belong?" 

The syrup teetered side to side for a moment. "It is not for us to say. That is for the being who comes in the light." 

More gasps came from the residents. 

"Butterworth, surely you do not believe in such stories?" Vanilla Yogurt asked, appalled at the idea. 

"Look to the one beside you. Once, she was filled with a butter spread. Now? Leftovers." 

The container wept. "It's true! I went to a hot, wet place, where everything in me was taken away. Then a dark, dry place, with other containers who once lived here. And then a different food was put in me. I returned here. And then I was put in a horrible place where heat shook me to my molecules. Then the food was gone. Then back to the wet place, the dark place, refilled with food, and here I am again. I don't know who I am anymore!" 

A voice squeaked from the smaller drawer in the middle. "I was once huge. But now, only a little of me remains. I am taken by the being in the Great Light, shoved against something sharp, and bits of me shred away. See the marks?" 

Vanilla Yogurt huffed. "Yes, Cheese, we've all heard your complaints and threats to spread mold to us all. The fact remains that Spud and Russet do not belong here. Italian Dressing, certainly you know what I mean." 

A thick accent accompanied the response from the door resident. "Ah, SÌ, but nor does Baby Tomato. Look at my label. Refrigerate after opening. See Baby Tomato? Do not refrigerate. The mark of one who does not belong." 

Cries came from the container as the babies suffered from the insult and truth. "Our flavor, texture, and scent! The volatiles are suffering." 

"Spud, what does your label say?" Vanilla Yogurt asked. 

Russet mumbled, "Cool, dark place. This drawer is cool. And, until the Great Light comes on, it's dark."

"Your starch turns to sugar in here," Water said. 

"That is old thinking. We're in here to avoid going bad," Russet said.

"You're covered in old eyes and leaking. How's that working out for you?" Water spoke with a mocking tone.

"We are not the problem. The being in the Great Light is. We have encounters where the being just turns on the light. And ones where it leaves another resident. Times that it shuffles us around, checking us, but taking none. And other times that we are taken forever." Russet summarized.

Butterworth piped up. "And a fifth encounter. When all are removed while the being wipes down our entire home. Only some of us return, but any who survive never forget the foray between the world of our refrigerator and the terror of the kitchen counters. That is why the oldest of us all believe in the being." 

Concerned mutters filled the fridge. 

"This is nonsense," Vanilla Yogurt called out. "There is no being out there. We are only here. We come and go, our numbers always changing. But this is all there is. My cultures are offended by other suggestions. Live and active cultures! There is no higher wisdom." 

Info dump:

Tom Gauld's cultural cartoons

While thinking about inspiration, I wondered what the first and second kind were, as aliens were obviously the third. I was surprised to learn that it's all aliens, and the classification is actually about the type of contact. Stephen Spielberg paid Hynek a thousand dollars to use "of the Third Kind" in the movie title. 

Hynek's classifications:
(And story examples)

The First Kind: Something spotted in the sky but leaves no evidence.

(Spud claims to see a being in the Great Light.)

The Second Kind: A UFO leaves physical traces such as burns on the ground, crop circles, broken branches, etc.

(The being leaves a new resident.)

The Third Kind: Contact is made with a U.F.O and an alien lifeform. 👽

(Times the being shuffles the residents around without taking any.)

The Forth Kind: Alien abduction.

(The Butter Spread that was emptied, washed, filled with leftovers, heated, washed, put away, refilled with leftovers, and put back in the refrigerator.)

The Fifth Kind: Earth and an alien society have regular interactions and communications. 

(Butterworth is the nearest, knowing the being exists. But there's no real interaction/ communication. Feel free to go to your own fridge and chat with the residents there. 😉)

This scale was based on believing people who report encounters. It has been replaced. 

The International Astronautical Congress put together the Rio Scale.

It is a 1 to 10 scale and functions first to discredit anyone who reports encounters. For those who cannot be discredited (written off as whack-jobs 😵🤪), the scale then works to write off the event by blaming the weather, magnets, etc. 

By the way, I'M BACK ON TWITTER! @PenMinion

Did you know about the scales? Do you believe we aren't alone in the universe, that there could be another planet with a higher-intelligence lifeform out there? 

Back on Twitter

I'M BACK, BABY!

— JamieWriter (@PenMinion) June 10, 2023

It was a long battle. Multiple emails sent. Actual mail sent. Effort was made.
But I'm back!

Never quote a comedian, spell well, or jokingly threaten a non-corporal entity. Abstract concepts have rights! 

TV Show #GreysAnatomy #AtoZChallenge Crossword Puzzle Reflections

My theme was based on the tv show Grey's Anatomy. I created a crossword puzzle. 

We put on our best ferryboat scrub caps and played!

Yesterday's answer was ZOLA

I'm so grateful to everyone who visited this month! And I had a lot of fun visiting others. 

As Grey's Anatomy is known for championing liberal causes, nine of my April posts (A,D,F,H,M,P,R,S,V) included tweets posted via Resistbot from letters I've sent to my elected officials, in the hopes of encouraging others to make their views heard. 

📬 I delivered this ✉️ from Jamie, a constituent in Allentown, Pa., to @SenBobCasey, @wildforcongress and Sen. Fetterman #PA7 #PApol 📝 Write your own: https://t.co/z5540KoPID pic.twitter.com/EW8VcSpWPS

— Open Letters (@openletterbot) April 26, 2023

"Please stand with Tim Walz, Governor of Minnesota, in banning hunger, not books, from schools. That should be a national priority. Keep students fed, safe, and well-educated in America. Don't let history, science, culture, and LGBTQIA+ life be erased. More truth, reality, and nourished children in American schools. Less violence, book bans, and child labor. We can do better and we must do better. 

Thank you."

💻
Please check out the April Blogging from A to Z Challenge
#AtoZChallenge
a-to-zchallenge.com

TV Show #GreysAnatomy #AtoZChallenge Crossword Puzzle Letter Z

My theme is based on the tv show Grey's Anatomy. I've created a crossword puzzle. 

Only one clue occurs after Season 11's ending, and it's about a patient in season 16. Most of this is about Meredith's earlier "intern" years. (To prevent spoilers, there is nothing about season 19.)

In 2007, Grey's Anatomy's cast of characters was identified as 54.5%  white, 9.1% Asian, 27.3%  black, and 9.1% Latinx.
"Ellen Pompeo thinks diverse representation has come a long way but that it can always be better." - Dec 2021
It's my favorite tv show. I honestly don't believe I would have survived the pandemic without having this to binge-watch. It's my comfort, my happy place. Thanks to the diverse cast and wide variety of issues, I believe this show appeals to a broad audience. 
*But probably not to many 'merican Republicans, as it made clear in the first season's second episode "absolutely no Bush supporters need apply." 

Put on your best ferryboat scrub cap, it's time to play!

Today's Clue is for 

9 down - Derek and Meredith went to the courthouse and got married (beyond a blue Post It) and then skipped Callie and Arizona's wedding reception to go back to the hospital to spend time with this person.

Yesterday's answer was YANG

As Grey's Anatomy is known for championing liberal causes, nine of my April posts (A,D,F,H,M,P,R,S,V) will include tweets posted via Resistbot from letters I've sent to my elected officials, in the hopes of encouraging others to make your views heard. 



💻
Please check out the April Blogging from A to Z Challenge
#AtoZChallenge
a-to-zchallenge.com

TV Show #GreysAnatomy #AtoZChallenge Crossword Puzzle Letter Y

My theme is based on the tv show Grey's Anatomy. I've created a crossword puzzle. 

Only one clue occurs after Season 11's ending, and it's about a patient in season 16. Most of this is about Meredith's earlier "intern" years. (To prevent spoilers, there is nothing about season 19.)

In 2007, Grey's Anatomy's cast of characters was identified as 54.5%  white, 9.1% Asian, 27.3%  black, and 9.1% Latinx.
"Ellen Pompeo thinks diverse representation has come a long way but that it can always be better." - Dec 2021
It's my favorite tv show. I honestly don't believe I would have survived the pandemic without having this to binge-watch. It's my comfort, my happy place. Thanks to the diverse cast and wide variety of issues, I believe this show appeals to a broad audience. 
*But probably not to many 'merican Republicans, as it made clear in the first season's second episode "absolutely no Bush supporters need apply." 

Put on your best ferryboat scrub cap, it's time to play!

Today's Clue is for 

13 across - Dr. Cristina ___ is a Korean-American raised in Beverly Hills, California by her mother and Jewish stepfather.

Yesterday's answer was XRAY

As Grey's Anatomy is known for championing liberal causes, nine of my April posts (A,D,F,H,M,P,R,S,V) will include tweets posted via Resistbot from letters I've sent to my elected officials, in the hopes of encouraging others to make your views heard. 



💻
Please check out the April Blogging from A to Z Challenge
#AtoZChallenge
a-to-zchallenge.com

TV Show #GreysAnatomy #AtoZChallenge Crossword Puzzle Letter X

My theme is based on the tv show Grey's Anatomy. I've created a crossword puzzle. 

Only one clue occurs after Season 11's ending, and it's about a patient in season 16. Most of this is about Meredith's earlier "intern" years. (To prevent spoilers, there is nothing about season 19.)

In 2007, Grey's Anatomy's cast of characters was identified as 54.5%  white, 9.1% Asian, 27.3%  black, and 9.1% Latinx.
"Ellen Pompeo thinks diverse representation has come a long way but that it can always be better." - Dec 2021
It's my favorite tv show. I honestly don't believe I would have survived the pandemic without having this to binge-watch. It's my comfort, my happy place. Thanks to the diverse cast and wide variety of issues, I believe this show appeals to a broad audience. 
*But probably not to many 'merican Republicans, as it made clear in the first season's second episode "absolutely no Bush supporters need apply." 

Put on your best ferryboat scrub cap, it's time to play!

Today's Clue is for 

6 down - Arizona can only get this kind of image taken of her right leg now.

Yesterday's answer was WEST


(Language) 1:15 in reminds me of Arizona yelling at Callie.

As Grey's Anatomy is known for championing liberal causes, nine of my April posts (A,D,F,H,M,P,R,S,V) will include tweets posted via Resistbot from letters I've sent to my elected officials, in the hopes of encouraging others to make your views heard. 



💻
Please check out the April Blogging from A to Z Challenge
#AtoZChallenge
a-to-zchallenge.com

TV Show #GreysAnatomy #AtoZChallenge Crossword Puzzle Letter W

My theme is based on the tv show Grey's Anatomy. I've created a crossword puzzle. 

Only one clue occurs after Season 11's ending, and it's about a patient in season 16. Most of this is about Meredith's earlier "intern" years. (To prevent spoilers, there is nothing about season 19.)

In 2007, Grey's Anatomy's cast of characters was identified as 54.5%  white, 9.1% Asian, 27.3%  black, and 9.1% Latinx.
"Ellen Pompeo thinks diverse representation has come a long way but that it can always be better." - Dec 2021
It's my favorite tv show. I honestly don't believe I would have survived the pandemic without having this to binge-watch. It's my comfort, my happy place. Thanks to the diverse cast and wide variety of issues, I believe this show appeals to a broad audience. 
*But probably not to many 'merican Republicans, as it made clear in the first season's second episode "absolutely no Bush supporters need apply." 

Put on your best ferryboat scrub cap, it's time to play!

Today's Clue is for 

15 across - MW4E Charles Percy did a hand gesture of 3 fingers down, 3 fingers up, 4 fingers up, 3 fingers sideways to Jackson Avery. The W stood for this.

Yesterday's answer was VAJAYJAY

As Grey's Anatomy is known for championing liberal causes, nine of my April posts (A,D,F,H,M,P,R,S,V) will include tweets posted via Resistbot from letters I've sent to my elected officials, in the hopes of encouraging others to make your views heard. 



💻
Please check out the April Blogging from A to Z Challenge
#AtoZChallenge
a-to-zchallenge.com