Interview with the 🧛♂️
Jamie Dorner
The stench of bleach and ointment hits me first. Blinds blot out the light of the northwest facing room with flowers wilting on the windowsill. A steady beep comes from one of the many machines connected to the man. His fingers curl, beckoning me near. I hit record on my phone as I set it in the holder, placing it on the table as I sit.
He watches me as I get settled. "I never found jeans to be comfortable. Any metal zipper, those jagged teeth, over my sensitive organ feels unnatural," he says with a wheezing cough.
I motion to his body. "Cotton hospital gowns worn by hundreds of others suit you better?"
"Sassing me is not in your interest. These coverings help the caretakers. Another cruelty of my existence is no longer being permitted to select my own clothes."
I nod. "You're the longest living patient in this hospice facility. Possibly the longest under this type of care in the country or world. I'm still researching. Does that sound right?"
"Records I'm sure to break. You want the story of my life?"
"The medical journal I write and podcast for is interested in you, yes. I also have a story going about a transplant patient. First one ever to get— "
An alarm sounds as his machine flatlines. In a blink, the machine goes silent. "There. So much better with these infernal gizmos shut off. Shall we begin?"
"How did you do that?" I ask as a nurse runs in.
He hands her a paper. "Signed and notarized. Off with you."
I'm dumbstruck. "What just happened?"
"A bit of business. A signed DNR allows me freedom from the machines."
"But you'll die!" Possibly before my interview is done. I can't stream this if he dies.
"That truly would be something to behold. Imagine if you caught the first death of a vampire on your recording device."
I glance at my phone to verify it is recording. "Vampire?"
"Indeed."
"Literally?" I ask.
"I would very much enjoy telling you my whole story."
"Are you planning to drink my blood? To kill me? To turn me?"
He points to an empty IV blood bag. "I've already fed. Killing you would only complicate my situation. As for turning you, well, I haven't done that sort of thing in ages."
I take a deep breath. "There's a window in the room. Does that worry you? Or my crucifix necklace?"
"The sun is annoying because my eyesight is enhanced, so it's much brighter to me than you. That's why I requested a northwest facing room. Religious symbols don't bother me, which is more than I can say for much of humanity. And no, the garlic you ate with your lunch doesn't make a difference, if you were about to ask. Silver is just a metal, but mirrors from centuries ago were not as good. I'm not a bat and, most disappointing, I cannot fly. There was a time when I was the greatest jumper in the world, but my knees aren't what they once were."
"Your knees?" I cross my legs, feeling my own knees move in the process, something I normally don't notice. "But you're a vampire."
"Yes. I'm immortal. I don't die. Who started the rumor that not dying equates to healing? The parts may last longer but they still wear out. Shall we begin with my human life? It wasn't interesting. Or my vampire one? Or are you still only interested in my years in hospice after the doctors have given up, believing they can do nothing more?"
"So you will die?" I rub my head. I didn't expect this interview to go this way.
"No. I'll leave here. Get a caretaker for my basic needs. And wait another decade or two for science to come up with something."
"Are you lying? Did you shut off the machine so I wouldn't notice tiny fluctuations in your heartbeat?"
The question is barely asked before he has me against the wall, pinned by my neck with my feet dangling. I see darkness in his eyes as sharp fangs extend from his mouth.
Word count = 685
Tagline= Interview With The Vampire 🧛♂️ opening scene with some twists
(Movie version. Though Anne Rice is listed as the main script writer.)
#WEPFF DECEMBER ’23 #OVER TO YOU
I'm very sad that this is the last flash fiction prompt from WEP. Since I joined my cousin in law in doing these, I've finally had something to blog which is comment worthy. Other than April A to Z and my political thoughts, I'm not sure this blog will see much of my time. I love that WEP gave me a reason to write a little every other month. I focus so much on others I forget to do what I love. Especially with the horrible NaNoWriMo controversy this year that resulted in a forum shutdown and many asking if they want to be affiliated.
I hope some of you will still drop by from time to time. And I really hope the book comes out!
Oh-oh. I didn't expect an interview to end this way. Most of my interview didn't - and I would know. I'm a journalist and conducted at least a couple hundred interviews for my newspaper.
ReplyDeleteOh, I forgot to sign my comment: Olga Godim from https://olgagodim.wordpress.com/
ReplyDeleteWhat a fun story. Looks like that vampire won't die soon. I also hope that you find a place for your writing.
ReplyDeleteNancy
Hi Jamie - interesting to read this challenging interview - I too wish you well for. the end of this year, and then all the best for 2024 - cheers Hilary
ReplyDeleteWell, my heart rate jumped at that ending!!! Well done!
ReplyDeleteWow! Way to go, Jamie. We're sorry WEP is closing down too, but the lack of numbers played a part, plus the over-extension of the team. But all is not lost. You're cordially invited to visit the WEP site the first of every month, (beginning Feb 1) to share whatever you want - a story, a question, an upcoming publication, a struggle etc.
ReplyDeleteThank you for openly enjoying writing for WEP. Ah, if only ...
Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year! May 2024 treat you more gently than has 2023.
Denise :-)
Hello Jamie! I enjoyed this unusual story that gave me goosebumps in the end.
ReplyDeleteThere are many flash fiction contests worthy of your words. Please consider those. But keep in mind WEP may not be gone forever. It's been a source of positive feedback for too long to just disappear. Keep writing, your stories resonate! Wishing you a blessed New Year!
ReplyDeleteOooh that's a chilling end.
ReplyDelete